Trinette Stanley is a Mental Health Educator in Anglicare‘s Family & Life Skills Education Team. In her role, she seeks to improve mental health literacy and normalise mental health conversations in the church. This article, written by Amy Yeung, summarises Trinette’s presentation at the September 2024 Spotlight Session on ‘Suicide Prevention.’
You can learn more about Spotlight Sessions and upcoming events from the Mental Health and Pastoral Care Institute here.
Changing the Narrative
September 10, 2024, was World Suicide Prevention Day. This year, the International Association for Suicide Prevention focused on the theme of ‘Changing the Narrative on Suicide’. Given that suicide is a complex issue, it is often shrouded in silence and a lack of understanding. Trinette’s spotlight, and this summary article, are ways we are inviting you into conversations about suicide so that together, we can break down barriers, raise awareness, and create better cultures of understanding, openness, empathy, and support.
Australian Data
From the data we can gain a few helpful insights. Given your interest in this article, you may already be aware of the first one—suicide is prevalent in our country. In 2022, there were 3,249 deaths by suicide in Australia (76% males, 24% females)[1]. There are also at least 65,000 attempts in Australia every year [2]. And many more who think about suicide and do not act on it.
Something else we learn from the data is that suicide can confront anyone at any age. It is the leading cause of death among 15-44 year olds [3], and the highest rates of suicide (per 100,000) are among males aged 45-49 and 85+ years old [4]. Further, not everyone who dies by suicide is experiencing a mental or behavioural illness [5]. This means none of us are immune. The circumstances related to suicide are complex and multifaceted and so we all need to be ready to have a conversation if we are worried about someone.
The Lived Experience of Suicidal Ideation
Beyond the data, it’s helpful to understand the lived experience of the people who represent these numbers—individuals who are made in the image of God. It could be a sibling, relative, colleague, minister, or member of your small group. There will be great diversity in their experiences but all who consider suicide are experiencing immense psychological distress.
In such a position, suicide can feel like the only option for ending the pain someone is experiencing. That’s an enormous weight for anyone to carry. As psychologist Melinda Moore says in a podcast (Addressing Suicide in Communities and Congregations), ‘It’s not that they want to die. It’s that they don’t want to live in the pain that they’re in.’ It ought not surprise us that people in our churches are in such pain. It is something that has always been true of Christian communities.
Role of a Christian Community
Throughout the Bible, we see people in distress and in pain. From King David crying out in Psalm 13, to Jesus praying in the garden of Gethsemane, ‘My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.’ (Matthew 26:38). While we don’t want to attempt to diagnose people in Scripture, we can find comfort in the reminder that distress is not indicative of a lack of faith or a lack of effort to change. It is part of the human experience. A part that even Jesus participated in.
As the Church, we have an opportunity to hold space for one another. We are made for connection and God can use his people to carry those who are struggling. Rather than trying to find a quick fix, we can be conduits of God’s presence, unfailing love, and enduring hope—even in the depths of despair. From extensive research and clinical practice, Dr. Bruce D. Perry can attest, “The best predictor of current mental health is your current relational health or connectedness.” [6].
Having a Conversation About Suicide
Understandably, there can be some fears about having a conversation about suicide. It may help to know that research has consistently found asking someone directly about suicide does not increase the presence or occurrence of such thoughts, nor does it put the idea in someone’s head. Initiating the conversation can offer people a safe space to talk about something that can be difficult to bring up.
One way you could start the conversation is to say, “This is a hard but important question to ask, because I’m concerned about you and care about you; are you thinking about suicide?” You may also be unsure about what to say in the conversation. Well, we can take a leaf out of the book of Job. His friends’ support was good, until they spoke. Often the best thing we can do is listen and hold space. Embrace pauses and silence. Resist the urge to give advice and instead adopt a posture of curiosity. Every story is different.
While all thoughts and talk of suicide is serious and requires an immediate response, that response will be different depending on a few factors. Asking follow-up questions can help you establish whether emergency intervention is required. For example, questions around:
- Time frame
- Access to means
- Whether things have been put into place
As far as possible, we want to allow the person to remain in control of decision-making, but if they are in danger of harming themselves or someone else, we need to take immediate action and call emergency services to keep people safe. Remember, you don’t need to have all the answers, but you can remind someone they’re not alone in this, you will hold on to hope for them and support them to connect with additional supports. You also don’t need to be alone in this as you support a loved one. Ensure you reach out for support for yourself too.
Suggested Resources
- Phone Numbers
- Suicide Callback Service: 1300 659 467
- Lifeline: 13 11 14
- NSW Mental Health Line: 1800 011 511
- Emergency: 000
- Courses & Training
- ‘Question Persuade Refer’ Gatekeeper Training: https://qpraustralasia.com.au/course/qpr-online-gatekeeper-training/
- Suicide Prevention for Seniors (Anglicare): https://www.anglicare.org.au/community/events-courses-training/suicide-prevention-for-seniors-program/
- Mental Health First Aid: www.mhfa.com.au
- Resources
- Suicide Prevention Resources for Churches https://mentalhealthinstitute.org.au/mental-health/suicide-prevention-resources/
- Books
- Mental Health and Your Church, Helen Thorne & Dr. Steve Midgley
- Tackling Mental Illness Together, Alan Thomas
- Preaching Hope in the Darkness, Scott Gibson & Karen Mason
- After the Suicide Funeral, Melinda Moore & Daniel Roberts
- Grieving a Suicide, David Powlinson
- Preventing Suicide, Karen Mason
- When it is Darkest, Rory O’Connor
- Grieving a Suicide, Albert Hsu
References
1. Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (2022). Deaths by suicide over time. Retrieved August 26, 2024, from https://www.aihw.gov.au/suicide-self-harm-monitoring/data/deaths-by-suicide-in-australia/suicide-deaths-over-time.
2. Slade, T., Johnston, A., Teesson, M., Whiteford, H., Burgess, P., Pirkis, J., & Saw, S. (2009). The mental health of Australians 2: report on the 2007 National Survey of Mental Health and Wellbeing. Retrieved August 27, 2024, from https://www.researchgate.net/publication/236611613-The-Mental-Health-of-Australians-2-Report-on-the-2007-National-Survey-of-Mental-Health-and-Wellbeing.
3. Australian Institute of Health and Welfare (2024, June 6). Leading causes of death. Retrieved August 26,2024, from https://www.aihw.gov.au/reports/life-expectancy-deaths/deaths-in-australia/contents/leading-causes-of-death.
4. Australian Bureau of Statistics (2023, September 27). Intentional self-harm deaths (suicide) in Australia. Retrieved July 30, 2024, from https://www.abs.gov.au/statistics/health/causes-death/causes-death-australia/latest-release#intentional-self-harm-deaths-suicide-in-australia.
5. Australian Bureau of Statistics (2023, September 27). Risk factors for intentional self-harm deaths (suicide) in Australia. Retrieved August 26, 2024, from https://www.abs.gov.au/statistics/health/causes-death/causes-death-australia/latest-release#risk-factors-for-intentional-self-harm-deaths-suicide-in-australia.
6. Winfrey, O., & Perry, B. (2021). What happened to you?: Conversations on trauma, resilience, and healing. Boxtree, 258.
